I got told tonight I was getting hung up on a girl... pretty annoying when that happens (not an expert I promise) I find. Truth is its probably true. There is a girl, I do like her but I don't think anything's gonna happen - either because I don't have the words or she doesn't have the feelings (still not sure which though). In a way now I am going along with the idea for the kicks, as well as the feelings. Regardless for the moment I cant let her drop.
Admitting that last line about kicks to myself made me realise something; I still haven't changed. I promised I would (a long time ago) leave off being a loner and a thinker and become a social and people person. Its a tough change, really tough. When your on you own stuff is os easy, you are the most interesting person there, you are right etc. etc. Being the highly educated, highly considered and highly opinionated person I am being a loner sits well with my personality.
I have changed alot though, I have a friend who thinks much the same way as I do but is still up for a good discussion about it. I just can't get on with people who don't stimulate or interest me any more.
Which leads me back to the first point, being hung up on a girl. Ok so I can't let her drop just yet but the friends evidence was the fact I nnever really go out with 'the lads' anymore and never really tried to 'pull' anyone. But the truth is it is the lone streak shining out still - very few people stimulate or interest me at the moment, the few that do I am already at the stage of closeness where it doens matter or I just know them from online. Im not sure if I am happy with this situation or not, probably a bit of both. If nothing else it gives me a chance to bitch (and to write a page of self indulgent pap like this :))
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment